Senior Column: Secrets


Makenzie Shubnell

Taken on the most revolutionary trip of Talon History- Detroit realness

Morgan Gallagher, Design Editor/Co-Photo Editor

I work in an office building that sells apartments. Mostly, I do the jobs that no one else wants to do- Filing papers, talking on the phone, mailing stuff. Dream job, truly (sarcasm). One day, on a slow Saturday, my coworker started conversation. She asked me if I was seventeen. I said yes. After that, she barreled on about how her seventeenth year was the greatest she’d ever seen. She rambled about how it was the “prime age” and told me that she felt “on top of the world”. I think about what she said from time to time. If I can tell you one thing, it’s that high school is not the most important time of your life- but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t matter. 

My name is Morgan, and I’m finished with high school in four days. End of the rope, bottom of the ninth, finish line in sight. Before I start this spiel, let me just say that most graduation speeches are exhausting and cliched (Unless they’re in the liking of David Foster Wallace’s This is Water). They all have one thing in common: the notion that the world is so entirely small. Special secret: it’s not. Things would’ve been a lot easier if I had realized that earlier.

Second special secret: be nice to people. News flash: it costs exactly $0, It’s not that hard, and things go smooth as butter if you maintain kindness. Revolutionary! Come one, come all! Watch today’s biggest phenomenon; NOT BEING RUDE: LIVE!

Third special secret: things always turn out okay. At least a couple times, in four years, things will not go your way. And, I’m not talking about just failing a test or having a fight with your mom. Even the really, really, bad things turn out okay- including the things that seem like they’ll never get better. As long as you keep watering your plants, you will be okay. The world always defaults to okay. In the grand scheme, things heal automatically. Everything tends towards okay-ness like a slow gravity. Trust me in saying I’ve seen the bad, the really bad, and the worse. It will be alright. Let it pass.

Fourth special secret: do ya thing. If you’re worrying about a person because they genuinely need help, they’re your real friend, or they’re your parents, keep on worrying. If you’re worrying about another person for virtually any other reason, stop worrying. Seriously, stop it right now. You do you, guys. Nothing good is ever going to come out of it if you’re concerning yourself, aimlessly, with others. I can almost guarantee you won’t feel as good. Worrying about the things that matter and providing general kindness and practicality to everything else truly changed me, and I wish I would’ve done it sooner.

Fifth special bonus secret: When you eat a lot of cupcakes, limit yourself at least a little. Don’t eat six of them and then act surprised when someone asks how many you had and they don’t laugh when you say you had six. Being relatable has it’s limits. Also, don’t choose to walk in the straight middle of two people sharing headphones in the hallway. You’re going to have to say sorry for ripping them out of two separate people’s ears and then stop while you try to get untangled. Also, being emo scene is always a phase. ALWAYS. If it’s not a phase, something needs to be fixed. I’ve been there. Also, don’t dye your hair 7 different colors by yourself. Especially if your hair is almost jet black. I had fun, but my poor hairs need help. 

In retrospect, I did a lot of things in four years; things that I’d never dreamed I’d be doing. They’re happening right now. You’ve got a real problem on your hands if you’re the same person you were on the first day of freshman year. I can say, in all honesty, I would’ve never befriended my freshman self unless the Second Coming of Jesus Christ was happening tomorrow. Really. However, I can also say that my freshman self would’ve been blown away if she met Senior Year Morgan™ (beta version 2.3) – in a good way, of course. In four years, I met my best friends in the whole world, my other best friend of two years strong (I can call him my boyfriend, luckily), and found out a lot about myself. I certainly didn’t figure all of it out, but I have more time for that. But, most importantly, I found out that Elvis Presley is lord. Senior year has been one of the coolest years of my life. But, I’m only seventeen, and sure, it’s a great age to be, but it doesn’t have to be your greatest. Stay alive, do what you want (as long as it’s not stupid), and remember it. Stay gold, Ponyboy.